...Punto and Castro have a freak collision chasing a flare behind second base, causing each to fracture a finger or sprain an ankle. Wait, no, Castro would never make it behind second base. Okay, let's see...

...during inter-league play, sliding to break up a double play, Prince Fielder trips Punto up, who falls into Fielder's gaping maw and is never seen again. Two innings later, Fielder inexplicably tries to steal second and, sliding in headfirst, bites off Castro's left foot as he is applying the tag.

...Punto slides headfirst into first base on his attempted bunt hit and breaks his wrist. Gardenhire's face turns the color of a beet. The following inning, Castro, in an act of solidarity with his fellow futility infielder, slides into first base on his weak groundout to SS. Although uninjured, Castro is immediately assigned to AAA by Terry Ryan as a precaution against Gardenhire's head exploding.

For Bartlett to Come Up...

...Hell must freeze over.

For Bartlett to Come Up...

...he must take laxatives. Then he'll get plenty of lessons on consistency and urgency.

Castro falls into the dugout chasing a pop-foul, and collides with Gardy, leaving Castro out for season with multiple fractures and Gardy in a coma.

Meanwhile, in an unrelated incident, Batista returns to the dugout and accidentally sits on Punto, killing him. Distraught, Tony leave baseball to become a missionary.

Realistically, for Bartlett to come up, it will have to be with another team.

For Bartlett to come up and actually log meaningful time:

The weasel will have to be managing something other than the Minnesota Twins roster. I believe he's got such a grudge against Bartlett, perhaps for not playing winter ball or perhaps banging his daughter, that Jason will never see meaningful playtime in a Twins uniform again.

He may, however, come up for the obligatory cup of coffee after rosters expand. He'll get to play once a week, will have absolutely no backing from the manager, will be put into miserable situations, and will likely post poor numbers. Whis is of course the weasel's plan all along: above all else, make your decisions look wise. Justify your decision to let Bartlett rot in AAA all season by making sure he fails during his sporadic play after rosters expand.

So, to summarize:

He'll never see meaningful time as long as the weasel is the manager, and will be set up to fail once called up in August.

...he'll have to be playing in St. Louis.

...the Twins will have to play in a double-header in September.

That's about all I could come up with that didn't involve a Castro/Punto injury.

I think I've figured out the Twins strategy, judging from todays posts from Gleeman and SBG--attrition. Everyone that talks critically about the team is getting tired of talking about the same stuff. I know I do and my only contributions are in the comments here and DTFC.

I see lots of scenarios. Original ones including:

Nick Punto could not run out an infield fly and then have the fielder drop it, only to force out Darling Nicky.

Castro could overthrow first base. Three times. In one inning. With Nathan Pitching. In a save situation. (Note: we don't get many of those!)

SBG could go back in time and give Mets infielder Ronald Gardenhire steriods that turned him into a slugger and he never develops a fondness for "Futility Infielders."

The Royals could trade us Minty for Castro. The New GM doesn't take the reins until June 8 - I say we do this! Might actually not be that bad a deal for either team.