Mark "minimum batters faced" Buehrle (4.34 xFIP)
Scott "Mike Sweeney ruined my perfect game" Baker (4.15 xFIP)
Things to remember as the WGOM is being invaded by Stribbers tonight:
- While I, just yesterday, began talking trades in the CoC many other, much more lopsided trades, will be proposed by new citizens tonight. When you tell them why a certain trade cannot be made remember to use stats like RBI's, Wins, and Fielding Percentage rather than wOBA, xFIP, and UZR. We don't want to confuse our new friends.
- If someone uses the handle "Fire Gardy and Varva" remark about how we were talking about them just the other day.
- In the unlikely event that a new citizen suggests we trade Mauer, Morneau, Span, and Kubel to stock up the farm system, please attempt to be on your best behavior.
- Supposing that an inexperienced citizen asserts Ron Davis should have been included in the All-Time Metrodome team please refrain from cursing.
- Whenever someone advises Gardy to play _elm_n more often because Gomez can't hit worth a lick mention how Gomez is faster. Hopefully this will suffice as an answer.
- If anyone types "Game Over. Season Over" other than a tenured citizen whom we know is using sarcasm, gently declare that while that previous play was in fact a bummer, but there are still 61 games left in the season and the Twins are only 3 games out of first place. Feel free to mention how if the Twins trade for Halladay (Holliday?) that you are sure the deficit would be quickly erased. This will help the two of you get along.
- A new citizen may lament the inability of our starters to go deep into games. Feel free to submit facts proving otherwise and move on. There is no reason to get into heated arguments (see: gun vs. knife)
- If someone complains the Nick Punto stinks reply back with comments like "Now you are getting the hang of things around here!!!11!"
The fine citizens of SBG Nation look forward to the impending intellectual discourse at the WGOM tonight. Welcome Stribbies, we are sorry if you don't get our jokes.
It seems like I have frightened everyone off with my game intro.
They're off using google image search to enhance their amusing retorts.
That's a tempting challenge: make comments only in image form.
I need more advance warning for this challenge.
But I called it a "challenge", so it should be hard, right?
I tried it: it's a pain to do, and it just annoys (I think) everyone else.
Yeah, I can imagine the annoyance potential is very high. I think I'll just leave it as "tempting".
I remember this and I quite enjoyed it.
ditto. You were on fy-er that game, Rhu_Ru.
I think it's cause it's moved 2 posts lower than the top of the homepage. Very fine instructions, though.
I have to move stuff off of the top. I wasn't sure it was there.
still basking in the glow of yesterday's game, I guess.
I won't be around tonight. The Boy has returned from his "European Vacation" (a People to People trip to England, Wales, Ireland, Scotland). I'm going home to be regaled with tales of his Haggis Experience.
Well, I'll be. My great uncle was heavily involved with that organization, including being awarded several honors, such as a lifetime achievement award in 2001 (John Cooper). It was extremely important to him.
Thanks for that little trip down memory lane.
My sister did People to People in 06, my brother the year after, and he was doing their Sports Ambassador program when I was seeing him in Vienna.
Once when I asked my parents why I never went, they told me I got invited/nominated, but they decided not to tell me.
Whoa, I totally did the People to People thing! I went to New Zealand and Australia in 2003 on one of the Sports Ambassadors trips. It was a blast.
Twins name Hrbek and Morneau both to the All-Time Metrodome team.....
It's just like a real All-Star team! You can never have too many first basemen!
Cop out!
To be fair, they did both play in the Metrodome...
I got nuthin.
No, me neither.
Oh snap! sorry, that reply made sense there.
How about an All-First Base squad? Add Killebrew, Carew, Mincher, Rich Reese, Vic Power....
Too good! Remember, it's a Dome All-First Base squad
Too hard to fill out a full lineup. M11, Ortiz, Stahoviak, Coomdog, Cuddyer...
On the grill tonight (many thanks to Mrs. Runner): Impending Sweep spaghetti, Light Rail Groundball green beans, Go-Go Bunt Single french bread, Twins' Rally strawberry shortcake, and, uh, Pepperwood Grove riesling (from Australia; really tasty stuff)
Pepperwood Grove riesling (from Australia; really tasty stuff)
It's got "Pepper" in the name, close enough to related to baseball for me.
Impending Sweep spaghetti dressed with Blyleven's Bertin' Puttanesca Sauce?
more like Pretty Bad Announcing prego
Ugh, I'm not going to enjoy this broadcast with Buerhle's perfect game being everywhere. Man would it be sweet to hang another 8 runs on that prick tonight.
And Baker gets his no-hitter. He then throws the game ball at Bert.
And he looks to the bullpen before every single batter he faces.
He's gotta point at Bert for a solid two minutes after throwing the ball, too. That would make it awesome.
And not keep it down.
I gotta be honest with you all. Had I not registered before today, I'd probably have registered tonight as "FIRE GARDY & VAVRA!!!"
Hey, we were just talking about you the other day!
I would so love to see Span bust up the perfect game in the first AB. Shutout too, for that matter.
And batters retired streak that Hawk was slobbering all over before the game.
HA! Coomer is a jerk! Did you see the way he taunted that fan with the foul ball?
Get Well Soon, Joe.
Ugh. Come back Crede!
To the field! DHing isn't good enough.
How many had Dazzle mispronouncing "ricochet" on their Twingo card?
Another Metrodome "hit"
Huh, I could have sworn that a halfway competent fielder would have had that.
"well done" by the "official scorer"
The perfect game is still in order after one batter. Noooooooooo!
You know what, after watching these commercials on mlb.tv for the past four months I am thinking about going to umpire school
You already have what it takes. Wait, you can see, right? Well, doesn't matter.
and the STRIB web hits begin falling through the floor.
Bert: get that ball down.
SBG: Drink up, folks!
FTLT: You got it!
I guess that means I should pour another?
Dang, another mispronounced "ricochet" from Dazzle -- we're playin' Twingo Blackout tonight, folks!
Hawk and Steve thought that the Twins got that call because they are in the dome. And so it begins.
Gaaaaaaaaasssssssssssssssssssssss.
How else do you explain the home field advantage the Twins possess at the Dome?
Cheating, clearly.
No, me neither.
There, that was better comment placement.
C'mon one of the 27 guests watching us have a good time, register! I was only having fun with the intro.
so, mlbtraderumors says Freddy Sanchez was scratched from tonight's lineup due to injury
So do you suppose if we got him, the Twins would have a three way platoon of Sanchez, Punto, and Casilla at second base?
Baker with a strikeout without keeping the ball down.
I'd like to hear Bert explain how the one ball in that at-bat that was down was nearly deposited over the baggie.
Good piece of hitting there.
FTLT: In the unlikely event that a new citizen suggests we trade Mauer, Morneau, Span, and Kubel to stock up the farm system, please attempt to be on your best behavior.
That means keep the shivs ready, but hidden, right?
Warning: Might be a big violent seeing as it is from "The Wire" and all
Shivtastic!
Naturally.
Gomez is taking some huge cuts.
Hey, did you guys here that Mark Buehrle threw a perfect game the last time he pitched?
And his perfect through three! Or just four batters away from tying the consecutive batters retired record!!
Get right out of town!
They keep showing the final out of that game, and holy crap, I thought Harrelson's home run call was obnoxious, but that just about made me cut off my own ears.
You would think that with 8 2/3 innings to prepare, he could have come up with a better call. YES! YES! YES! YES!
You would think with however many years he's been up there, he'd have gotten fired by now.
You know, not that I want a Hawk-esque homer on the annoucing team, but it's really annoying to listen to Dick-n-Bert give a bunch of lip service to some of these opposing players. Derek "Calm Eyes" Jeter, Mark "Still Pitching a Perfect Game through 3 innings" Buehrle, etc. I hate these guys, you should too!
You know, listening to the White Sox tv guys is like listening to two drunk idiots watching the game on their couch. There's no analysis despite, I assume, having a color guy. There's not really any play-by-play. Really, there's no point to these guys other than to annoy me.
They're playing to their audience.
Good point.
How's that Hop Hearty treatin ya?
It went pretty quick, that's for sure. Next time, I'm going in with a wad of bills and a two-wheeler.
Just make sure you get out there around Octoberfest season and get some Staghorn.
Done and done.
So, if Dazzle were to be, uh, injured when early Oct. rolls around, think Shane Mack could be named to the Dome All-Star team in his stead?
I notice that through the first three innings, we have no hits and no Twins have reached base. If we can keep that up for 9 full innings it's a perfect game for us, right?
Ok, I got it. It remains 0-0. Buerhle has a perfect game heading into the bottom of the ninth. Gomez leads up with a bunt single, then the White Sox start throwing the ball all over the place and Gomez manages to come all the way around to score the walk-off.
Does he run AJ on the way to the plate?
I would prefer Morneau to hit a dinger here. Though, to be fair, your scenario seems pretty awesome too.
Oh, and Hawk bites down in frustration and accidentally bites his own tongue off and can no longer speak for the rest of his life.
Better yet, he reaches on an error. So no hits allowed, but because it's not 9 full innings, it's not recognized as a no-hitter.
After Beuhrle throws the ball over Konerko's head, Go-Go keeps running, Dye throws the ball in from right and AJ drops it as Gomez scores!
MARK BUEHRLE IS PERFECT. SO PERFECT. PERFECT! PERFECT! PERFECT!
I'm drunk, but I giggled
Anybody else getting tired of Buehrle getting outs?
Exhausted.
Oops, forgot the image.
Exhausted.
Do you find something comical about the car I drive?
Ha ha!
It is the laaargest car that I can afoord.
Anyone else getting tired of Light Rail getting overshadowed when he's pitching a pretty good game?
more tired of Bert criticizing him for not being even better
He sucks. Buehrle is obviously "outpitching" him.
The problem is all the foul balls.
What about this Buehrle guy? Did he do something recently? I haven't heard.
Doesn't matter who the opposing pitcher is, I think this happens every time he pitches and Bert is in the booth. Complains when he keeps "the ball up," but talks about everything else when he's dealing.
Due. As in we're due. Do.
Here's your ending for you: 2 outs in the bottom of the 9th, Wise drops an easy pop fly, and THEN Morneau blasts a HR.
Forget you guys. You know what would be perfect? Twins scoring 10 runs next inning.
ftw
Ok, this is a pretty good idea, too.
Better make it 11 runs. We've never blown an 11 run lead.
Hey Dick, no politics!
You too, Bert.
Ugh. White Sux guys are taking a page from the "ZOMG! BAKER ISTEH SUCK!" page. They're railing against the high fastball and, apparently, the lack of changing speeds and how hitters are going to make adjustments eventually.
well, he should do fine against the Sox then
Dick: "There's your run."
What a jerk.
Whoa... I'm way up here?
Dazzle sez Baker like one of Buck Owen's Buckaroos: Byaker.
Perfect?
Somewhere, DPWY is curled up in a ball.
And StatFreak 101 is bashing his head against the padded wall.
I want to go to bed, but not before the Twins get on base. Please someone get hit by a pitch or something, I have a long day tomorrow.
C'mon Crede, get selfish.
OMG, he threw the ball out.
I wanted someone to punch that stupid smirk off his face.
Jeebus, I'd be happy with an outfield fly. How many frigging infield ground balls can one team hit in a game?
You are fucking KIDDING ME! He's perfect through FIVE.
Okay, it's official. The WGOM just set a record for F-bombs in one season, and it's only July!
There is a correlation between F bombs and homeruns.
F*ck off.
Heh, you're just padding the stats now...
It's a contract year.
Game over, boys.
Season over. Fuck.
At this point, a lined drive single by Casilla to break it up would run some salt in the wound. Anyone have Cesar Tovar's phone #?
Starts with 555
Strangely enough I think the last four numbers are also 5.
Alright, I am about to get DPWY about Beuhrle in an inning or two here.
I havent read the game log..but does anyone find Morris and Dazzle unbearable in the booth tonight?
I think I would find them very pleasant tonight with what I have to listen to.
Trust me, c-toy--you wouldn't.
Rob Halford?
Close enough.
You gotta 'nother thing comin'...
Well that is homo-erotic.
Baker sucks. He's getting killed out there. Right?
No doubt about it. Stats show it and everything, especially pitch locations.
Yes. He's given up hits. Maybe the Twins can throw him in the package for Halladay.
I'd add in Jesse Crain and R.A. Dickey. That should get it done.
Baker + Mauer. Will that get it done?
I think that would do it.
Unleash the F-Bombs.
So, Baker not throwing a perfect game tonight?
too many friggin' cheers in the stands on the dinger
Jermaine Dye is an ass hole.
Game over.
Season over
Let the fire sale begin.
Where are the new citizens saying this? I really fear that I frightened future readers of the WGOM tonight. Sorry, Boss.
Piss Slag, er, Fuck off!That is not polite.
season over.
Eff Jermaine Dye, eff him right in his Buehrle.
You choose:
Twins lose 10-0 or Buehrle throws a perfect game?
10-0, every time.
10-0. I would be able to go to bed and stop listening to Harrelson in that situation. (and not have to watch any Punto at-bats the rest of the night)
Piranhas coming up!
o.k. so who gets the first hit off Beurhle. I say Span.
Gomez, please.
No, it won't be a Twin, I'm thinking.
Well played.
Alanzo, FTW.
Okay, at this point I don't mind Dazzle and Morris talking up Buehrle's game -- going for the superstition breaker.
Did Buehrle on Letterman remind anyone of Kirby on the Late Show?
Perfect game over.
ha! Bite me, Buehrle!!
NOT a perfect game.
that's pathetic.
time to end the no-hitter
and then the shutout?
Prescient.
I have never been so pumped about a walk in my life.
YES!!!
Thank the gods! Fuck Buerhle and the horse he rode in on.
o.k. here comes the hit.
Nailed it!
We have a winner!
Walk to the ninth hitter. Whoa. Who had that in the pool?
Nobody's standing for Mark Buehrle, Dick. We all hate that fucking fuck.
Heh...yeah, I read the log before I posted.
Ha ha ha. Alexi Casilla breaks up the best streak in baseball history
Who woulda thunk Casilla would be the one to break that string?
Yeah, me neither.
So he loses the perfect game on a walk to Alexi ".162" Casilla. That's pretty fucking sweet.
With a .248 OBP too. Oh wait, I used a forbidden stat, crap.
Zack has been here for a little while, it is okay.
Spantastic.
SPAN! Fuck Buerhle some more!
Okay, now let's win this fucking game.
Okay, Mauer to deny the shutout. Let's go, Jeebus!
Now all of a sudden we have two men on for Baby Jesus!!!
Okay, Mauer. Put it over the fucking wall!
That's one way to do it!
Hey Bert, no one was cheering for Buehrle there.
Hahahahahaha!
Fucking A!
W00t!!!
Hey everyone, party at the Runner house!!
Sorry, I am too drunk to get to the airport. This game has got me to drinking.
FUCKIN YES!
FUCK. YES.
Sweet
Baby JesusD-Span, I can sleep.Ha! The one Sox player I dislike more than Mr. Perfect, fucking Podsednik.
Joe!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hate all you like, that was a helluva run for Buerhle.
The fuck.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's get a
fucking win.
Have you guys about got this fucking fuck stuff out of your fucking systems? Fuckin' A.
Well if brianS is going to start cursing what the fuck, I will do it too!
It was just a waaahfer thin mint....
Hey! F*** you, too; F******!
I wonder what Gleeman will make of that? (Still on for the game, right Boss?)
Maybe. We'll talk tomorrow. Another bad report from Winona tonight.
Ah, Jeez... Sorry.
If it wasn't Buerhle doing it, I might have been rooting for a Van Der Meer.
Gregg Wong = the reason the Twins are an amazing defensive team
Stew Thornley gets an assist. He does about half the games.
o.k. I don't watch the games with the sound on. Obvious reasons. The downside is that I don't know why the Twins pulled Baker. What's up with that?
115 pitches.
He. Looked. At. The. Bullpen.
Thanks. got it.
really high pitch count
Almost 120 pitches.
No heart.
heh.
Wow. Now it's a "pitchers duel" and Baker pitched "outstanding." What the...
Well, he said "outstanding" and not "outstandingly," so the Earth is still spinning.
Last season was Quinten's third full season. Once he finished in the top 20 in HBP. Look stuff up before you say it, dude.
charge the mound!!!
Now that's a HBP.
That would have been a great way to break up the perfect game.
Kevin Brown would be happy to have some company.
I'm still pretty partial to the "walk-the-9th-hitter-who-sucks" method.
What a choker. Five plus perfect innings and then falls apart.
Holy, fuck, what a game.
Wow, the defense really relaxed after the streak ended, eh?
That may have been the greatest fucking hit in the history of baseball.
Now that the perfect game is gone, I want to see Twins getting on base every single way possible. Got the HBP out of the way, now time for AJ to interfere with Harris.
Dirty fucking Harry!
Yes! Buehrle with a Baker-like implosion!
No heart.
You're welcome.
The sincerest form of flattery.
Game over. Season over. (For the White Sox)
well said.
o.k. try again.
three times but still valid.
Sublime minimalism, sir.
**edit**
Image a classic, but a played out. I like the nothingness of the previous posts. Sublimation withdrawn.
Yes, even Punto.
Dirty fucking Punto!
Man I'm loving this.
And Dick has a key to the inning!
Fuckin' Punto? Fuckin' Punto!
They're cheering for Buerhle. My eyes. My eyes!
I feel quite sure they were cheering for the runs, not Buehrle.
He tipped his hat to the crowd behind the Sox dugout and they weren't Sox fans.
And, yes, I flipped the "r" and the "h." Blarg.
Fuckin' Punto....
I saw a White Sox blog last year, and they hated Punto. I bet they are going bananas right now.
So they differ from us how?
(Ok, that's not fair to White Sox bloggers.)
Aww...White Sox fans and Twins fans can come together!
Most of us can spell.
Tottaly!
I think they thought of him as some sort of White Sox killer. I was thinking to myself "thank god we're rid of him at the end of the season."
But alas...
Those White Sox guys hate Gomez about as much as I hate Burly. They absolutely despise GoGo.
I love that guy even more
I always shudder when I see a pickoff attempt with him at first.
He gets thrown out on the bases more than anybody I've ever seen.
And that's saying something with Cuddyer on the team.
+ two left feet.
If that's true, that's an accomplishment, since most guys reach base 60%-or-so more often than he does.
Hi everybody!
Hey meat? Have you been made aware that Buerhle had a perfect game recently?
I hate that giy.
Howdy, painter.
painter.
Heh, I just had a curator over to pour over my work, he took a print with him for a show in October-.
Very nice.
Hey meat, watch this.
ZAMIER!
Man that shit breaks my heart.
I love buffalo.
Believe it or not, an ex girlfriend of mine is one of the two ladies going bonkers for him. FWIW, you and the Dr. always have a place to stay in Buffalo. Also, there are plenty of places to drink--- until 4am.
We will take you up on that. I miss buffalo dearly, that town knows how to eat and drink, and drink, and drink.....
And eat. Plus, my current lady friend works at Papa Jake's and she gives me and my friends tons of free booze/food!
my current lady friend works at Papa Jake's and she gives me and my friends tons of free booze/food!
Now you're just rubbing it in.
That meatloaf is delicious.
Also, there are plenty of places to drink--- until 4am.
Unless I'm there. Then there are plenty of places to drink---open until 11pm.
Has Ozzie kicked anything yet?
I've got a couple of fingers I could use to salute Burly.
+ 1
Did Bert just call Greg Gagne "very strong"?
So Gagne weighed about 130 pounds dripping wet it looks like
Bert has Strat-o-Fucking-Matic?!??!
Sadly, it was Dick.
and it's still unopened, I'm sure
Oh, right, it was.
So I'm a little offended at the way all you Citizens have been spelling Burley's name. Fuck him and his fucked up spelling and his fucked up Gordon Beckham like fucking smirk.
So....... how do you really feel?
Ducks on the pond for the Mountie. Drive 'em in, Jason!
Not gettin the call = missed the strike zone?
w00t! Twins baseball.
Walkawalka!
That works.
man, if this game weren't at the Dome, it'd still be a perfect game... /Hawk
He just said this game should have been over long ago with no runs crossed.
They should have just called it after 5 because of rain?
I think everything that happened after the 5th was a bad call by the ump.
Beautiful, fucking beautiful.
I feel like I am going to use this picture waaaay to often.
Took me a second to get it.
that's gold, sir, gold.
Your etchings are pedestrian. Wooden, even.
The folds in his pants are a little stiff.
But they're not so bad that they keep him from standing erect.
Hey, I know that guy! He's a PC.
Mac aren't so bad.
Sure, it is a stretch but I had a streak to continue; a steak of posting hot babes in every game log.
I approve of this streak.
Second!
Don't hate me, but I don't see it with Keira Knightley. At all. I can't even force her to look attractive to me.
But there is an austere sort of beauty in anorexia, don't you think?
Heh. Yes, it's indeed the gross lack of weight.
Tonight an actress from my era who could've eaten a few more sandwiches, too.
You had to one up me, didn't you?
Parker Posey trumps
allmost.Dr. Feel Good is in the house tonight.
And he's got the camera and is showing dejected White Sox fans at the Dome. I will never get tired of that.
Oh, scrappy little Pods. I love watching you fail. It's beautiful, in its way.
Did the camera in the feed you're watching keep cutting to him in the dugout after he missed that Mauer fly ball? Compelling stuff.
I missed that play, actually. A shame.
Oh, when you see the highlights, you'll love it. The perfect type of play for someone who hates the guy.
Now you can watch it indefinitely. In slow motion.
Now someone just needs something showing the look on his face that said: "I'm not even good at being scrappy anymore. If I don't have that, what the fuck do I have?"
He still has the crazy-hot wife.
that was one weak effort by Pods.
Thank you thank you thank you thank you!
Seeing how it's profanity night... get Keppel the fuck off of this team.
Love these (relatively) briskly played games.
Hehe, the AT&T Rapid Rewind on CSN showed Burly striking guys out, but forgot the part where he gave up the runs.
Did Keppel not get the memo about Twins pitchers not walking batters?
Tigers lose to Texas.
Keppel you fucking suck!
Oooh, can two games in a row end on Beckham striking out? That would be sweet.
No, no they can not.
Hmmm, save opportunity now isn't it? Bring in Nathan for another one out save!
Joe Nathan getting up??
for god's sake, he threw six pitches yesterday. Is Gardy trying to ruin his arm?
I repeat, why is Keppel still on this team? Have we no groundskeeper? Have we a need for his particular style of mediocrity? Have we become nostalgic for the pitching of Luis Ayala?
Yes.
Keppel sucks. Absolutely sucks.
Sheesh, Keppel. I deem thee Fuckface.
Keppel is a fucktard.
C'mon FTLT, you are better than cursing
I love how Nathan doesn't mess around with these inferior hitters.
I love how Nathan doesn't mess around
with these inferior hitters.Twins win!
I love beating the White Sox. It's orgasmic!
Right, it's like we've all been fucked!
FTW.
and that closes the books on about a thousand f-bombs.
Thank goodness. I was getting a little worn out. Though, to be fair, we were trying to make our Strib visitors feel welcome.
Fuck you, Buffalo.
Fuck you, Burly.
w00t! Twins Win! Gladden doesn't seem to care.
You're surprised how?
The Twins are now 12-3 on Tuesdays. Somebody has to pick up the slack for Spooky.
Hey, I got my second win yesterday! I'm on a streak of one in a row!
That was a fun game to be at.
Well, it looks like I missed a classic while coaching T-Ball and then dinner after. Got to listen to the second inning and the end of the seventh, so I had no idea Buerhle had a perfecto going so long until I came home and saw the scroll across the bottom of the screen on ESPN. Going to have to watch the replay on this one.
Great game and an epic game log. Yesterday illustrates both why I'm a Twins fan and why I love this site.